Balance Of Buttfunex "Cold Storage" Address Down 50 kiloBitcoin And Falling

Bitfinex death watch continues with the address declared to be their "cold storage" down 50,000 Bitcoins and counting. This comes as Buttfunex's fait banking partners have ceased processing fiat withdrawals from this fiat emphasized fiat/Bitcoin interface. Sorry for your loss… butt fun while it lasted.

Buttfunex's Fiat Banking Partners Move Towards Becoming Ex's

Bitfinex self reported that their fiat-side banking partners in the Republic of China1 are going to soon stop doing banking work for them on the bank's initiative. This is in line with the other China's attitude towards their fiat emphasized fiat/Bitcoin interfaces. Sorry for your loss, butt fun while it lasted.


  1. also known as Taiwan, Island China, or Little China  

Hussein Bahamas Advisor Susan Rice Fingered As Surveillance To Political Operatives Conduit

Numerous sources are fingering Hussein Bahamas advisor Susan Rice as the conduit who carried so called "incidentally collected" surveillance on US President Trump and his associates to the rest of Hussein Bahamas political operatives. Jeff Bezos run fake news outlets under the "Washington Post" label are predictably running pieces alleging that not only did Susan Rice not do such a thing, but she should have because it would be "Right, Good, and Proper"(TM)(R).1


  1. The same outlets have run a piece of speculative fiction supposing an American "Reichstag Fire" which would subvert the "rule of law" pretense. Unfortunately the piece was published 5684 days after September 11, 2001.  

US Securities Regulator Denies Another "Paper Bitcoin" Trading Instrument

The United States Securities and Exchange Commission (WOT:unpersons) has denied a petition by a venture calling itself "SolidX" (WOT:nonpersons) to trade a paper security simulating Bitcoin on US markets. This follows the same group's denial of a similar petition by the Winkelvii (WOT:unregistered eukaryote) to list a paper simulated Bitcoin instrument. Sorry for your laws.

Resistance Leader's Wife And Stepson Charged After Body Found

A body alleged to belong to Missouri resistance leader Frank Ancona was found in the Big River1 by fishermen according to local press reports. St. Francois County Prosecutor Jarrod Mahurin has filed charges against Ancona's wife and stepson accusing them of murdering the patriarch.


  1. The actual proper name of the body of water and not a euphamism for the legitimately large Missouri or Mississippi Rivers.  

Socialist Seek To Replace Socialist Zuckerberg On Facebook Board For Insufficient Socialism

A minority group of Facebook shareholders are organizing an effort to replace socialist Mark Zuckerberg (WOT:nonperson) as Chairman of the board at the firm. The coup organized by "consumer watchdog" SumOfUs claims that an "independent" chair would:

"oversee the executives of the company, improve corporate governance, and set a more accountable, pro-shareholder agenda."

SumOfUs describes itself as an organization:

"Fighting for people over profits"

Which raises the serious question of what they imagine a "pro-shareholder" agenda to be.

This goes to show that even a sworn friend of socialism like Mark Zuckerberg who presides over one of their favorite cesspools is in reality far less protected from the activists than those who deny the leftists their support, sympathy, and proximity. This coup seems unlikely to forcefully unseat Zuckerberg from the Facebook chairmanship unless he chooses to step down, but it highlights the fact that when dealing with leftists, you can not possibly pay your enemy enough to love you. So long as you have and they have not, you will always be their enemy.

Death Cult Propagates Among Some Chinese Miners

As mentioned in Shinohai's latest shitcoin Roundup, a few single language Chinese miners have taken to expressing an unjustified degree of loyalty to yet another doomed anti-Bitcoin forking effort. In the same week the fork effort's defective client unintentionally fell out of consensus due to its inherent slop, Andrew Quentson (WOT:nonperson) published a purported "cosmetically corrected" interview with Jiang Zhuoer (WOT:nonperson) where among other things Zhuoer confesses to "SPV mining" while asserting to have 100 million dollars1 committed to destroying any actual Bitcoin network which remains after splitting his favored altcoin from Bitcoin.

If Zhuoer's intent actually corresponds to what the words printed in English mean,2 it represents a paltry counter to the deterrent presented by Mircea Popescu and other lords of the Most Serene Republic, which has thus far damped off earlier social engineering attempts to fork Bitcoin into something else before they could root.

Continued imprudence among mining pool operators suggests that a solution to the mining bug3 in order to disabuse certain activist factions of their imagined participation in Bitcoin. Importantly, recent efforts by the People's Bank of China to bring sanity to their local fiat/Bitcoin interfaces does not preclude future statal attempts to attack Bitcoin via the mining vector from the People's Republic of China.  Sorry for your loss.


  1. A mere 10,000 Bitcoins today, less tomorrow 

  2. Such is the least of the curses handicapping the monophone single language speaker.  

  3. Some solutions have been proposed to constrain the impact of the bug  

Vessenes Gox Drama Continues

Peter Vessenes (WOT:nonperson) of the failed Vessenes' Phoundation and failed start up Coinlab continues to stir the drama pot as he holds out hope that a court just might award him a portion of the insolvent Gox's corpse. Such a move would naturally represent the first, last, and best revenue received by Vessenes venture which promised much and delivered nothing.

Dicamba Disaster Continues Destruction

As the story of the Dicamba Disaster in the United States begins finally reaching mainstream media outlets, the St Louis Post Dispatch brings us news that Dicamba Drift has threatened Missouri's largest peach orchard (archived). Two hundred and fifty acres of the orchard's peach trees are already irreparably harmed and as the damage continues to show that number could double by next spring as the injury progresses.1

Dicamba has been around since 1942. Until this year it had largely survived in its humble role as that thing you add as a tiny fraction of a percent to your tank mix as a little kicker to beat back broadleaf weeds. What it did, what it didn't do, and why it stayed that tiny fraction were established. Why it stayed the tiny fraction is that dicamba is volatile and the dicamba that doesn't get absorbed and bound will vaporize and spread.

The ascendancy of Roundup Ready in the 1990's inspired much panic. "Genetic modifications AND a super herbicide?" Glyphosate however turned out to be a kitten with the surfactants mixed with it carrying a greater hazard to fauna than the herbicide itself, flora was still fucked though.2

Monsanto opened a pandora's box with their latest offering, because when you offer desperate farmers soybeans that won't suffer any losses with two herbicides those farmers are getting as much mileage out of those two herbicides as they can. Bad behavior becomes mandatory, because fuck that other family's peach orchard which took a generation to grow. Also no one cares about the other stands of mature trees yellowing, defoliating, and in clear decline.3

It would likely have not made things much better even if Monsanto released their "less volatile" dicamba with the seeds4 so long as other people were selling classic Dicamba preparations for less. The competition between agriculture and chemistry is leaning decidedly in chemistry's favor with crops outside of the limited Monsanto supplied corns and alt-corns becoming environmentally impracticable. US agriculture at this point appears to on track to become a fiefdom of tort law in the same way US medicine is by this time next year. This is the story of your loss and imazapyr resistant crops can't come soon enough (archived).


  1. And even in the absence of further dicamba applications nearby it will continue to progress.  

  2. But only if the glyphosate solution actually made contact with foliage.  

  3. This phenomena is pointedly NOT limited to the portions of the Ozarks that US based media is suggesting it to be. 

  4. It seems likely they anticipated the destruction and didn't want their preparation taking the blame.  

Preet Indicts Hondurans In Honduras

Evil itselfAgent of oppresion Preet Bharara handed out indictments to 6 Honduran policemen on Wednesday. These officers are not of Preet's District in Manhattan or even the United States. The officers allegedly conspired to smuggle cocaine between points that are not in the United States, though Preet assures the destination was the United States and not one of the other countries that likes cocaine too.1Undercover officers fraudulently misrepresenting themselves as Mexican narcotics wholesalers offered the officers a million United States dollars in bribes to "ensure the safe passage of tons of cocaine through the jungles of Honduras" Bharara said. The officers allegedly operated the smuggling ring over a ten year period. Last month Fabio Porfirio Lobo, the son of a former Honduran president, plead guilty to some charges and introduced the accused officers to the fake merchants. Sorry for your laws Mister World Police.


  1. This list consists of all of the countries.