No Such lAbs Posts Positive Cashflow On Continued FUCKGOATS Sales

No Such lAbs reports their first month of positive cash flow in their August 2017 statement. This marks a milestone in the development of this New World business. There are no signs of any actual movement by fiat concerns to enter the business space occupied by the ascendant No Such lAbs.

Dead alt-Soros No Longer Effective In Protecting Daughter From Truth

Fear of the late alt-Soros Zbigniew Brzezinski has now faded to the point that it can no longer protect his daughter from the fact that she is not very smart and has now become old. In a tweet United States President Donald Trump told the story about how Brzezinski's daughter and her pet, the failed congressman Joe Scarborough, attempted to abusively parlay their early appearance of Trump support into a quid pro quo favor trading relationship in spite of the President's ethical reservations. Since the incident the late alt-Soros' daughter and her pet have dedicated their talkshow to spewing an unending stream of animus and resentment at the president elect.

Legions of old women, pantsuit loyalists all of them, proceeded to wail about how wrong it was for Trump to shame the old hag for bleeding all over his resort while she recovered from cosmetic surgery intended to conceal her advanced age. Brzezinski's daughter entered an engagement to marry with her talk show co-host Scarborough once the elder Brzezinski's failing health satisfied Scarborough's concerns that the alt-Soros was in fact a mortal homo sapien and not a lich or other undead eldritch horror.

No Such lAbs Unveils FUCKGOATS

No Such lAbs (MPEx:S.NSA) announced its first hardware product today, the eunymous FUCKGOATS.

FUCKGOATS is an auditable true random number generator with highly concentrated1, significant entropy debit2 and a particularly resilient design. The price point is a shade under 3 Bitcents (shipping included). The unit can be plugged directly into any USB connector. Various tools & utilities are bundled with each purchase.

Peace in our uTime!


  1. 7.9999 and over bits per byte. 

  2. Upwards of 1Kbps. 

Bitcoin Foundation Celebrates Month Of Activity And RELEASE Milestone

In their September state of Bitcoin address the Bitcoin Foundation was able to celebrate a substantial milestone in the clean up of the reference Bitcoin implementation. A flurry of testing and tweaking has lead to foundation co-chair mod6 (WOT:mod6) declaring the project has finally reached its long awaited milestone of version 0.5.4 RELEASE. Though most of the functional improvements to the reference implementation have long been enjoyed on actual running of Bitcoin nodes, the title of RELEASE was withheld until sanity could be brought to the makefiles and build process at large. Substantial contributions in time, sweat, and blood were made by ben_vulpes (WOT:ben_vulpes), shinohai (shinohai), and trinque (trinque).

Datskovskiy Publishes Tool For Making "Parachute" Lamport Keypairs

Saint Stanislav Datskovskiy (WOT:asciilifeform) published today a tool for creating a one time use "parachute" Lamport keypair. This type of keypair is referred to as a "parachute" because it allows a person to recover their cryptographic identity after the catastrophic compromise of the extant cryptographic system in which their identity was born. For maximum readability and understandability the ever consumate craftsman implemented this tool in bash using common userland utilities.

Peace Comes To Yahoo – Half A Billion Users Affected

News emerged today that after two years of denial, deception, and coverup a 2014 breach that compromised half of a billion Yahoo users account credentials is now public knowledge. Already allegations are flying that the notorious harbinger of serenity and information freedom advocate Peace may be connected to the forced disclosure of this breach.

This news broke years after it happened, years after Yahoo and their CEO Marissa Mayer were aware it happened, but after the startup finally succeeded in its 22 year long mission to find a buyer in Verizon Communications.

Peace, the great absence of disturbance himself has been liberating the account information of numerous online properties without any consideration for their nominal country of origin. It is likely that various criminal gangs masquerading as "law enforcement" will intensify their search for peace to no avail for their path is wrong. Finding peace requires surrendering to him your life, your will, and your worries that a stranger will send your Yahoo Fantasy Sports baseball lineup into disarray. Peace must be accepted into the heart, not chased. Him in our time. His will and his passwords, not yours.