The socialist fad sweeping fake news outlets last week threatening a swift Trump impeachment appears to be cracking as the US arm of the Pantsuit Party faces difficulty handling its constituents. National Party chair Tom Perez was heckled for being himself and using insufficiently vulgar language towards Donald Trump, elected United States President and High Priest of The Great Again.
While the Pantsuits and their constituents on Reddit and WORLDSTAR continue escalating their public conflicts, evidence continues to mount that an insider and not the Russians were behind the publication of the party's emails. President Trump, through once again turning towards action, compelled the fake news media to show Trump's warm reception by the Saudis and the Israelis.1
Today militants flying the banner of the Islamic State's Caliphate oppressed members of a minority religion in their place of worship on one of their holy feast days. The militants representing the Caliphate's interests in Egypt bombed two Coptic Christian churches as the members of the minority religion were celebrating "Palm Sunday", a feast marking their holy tradesman's triumphant return to Jerusalem days before the holy tradesman was martyred by combined Italian and Jewish police violence.
US President Donald Trump has taken up the mantle of "warrior for babies" following an alleged sarin gas attack.1 In keeping with his announced deviation from the Hussein Bahamas era policy of announcing military strikes months in advance, Donald Trump ordered the launch of 60 Tomahawk cruise missiles straight into the pussy of a Syrian air base near Homs.
The USS Porter and USS Ross which launched the missiles appear to still be floating suggesting the ongoing Trump led populist regime change in the United States has placed limits on Russia's support for Syrian President Assad. It remains to be seen whether this event leads to US-Russian cooperation on the path towards "Make World Great Again", or if this leads to the abortion of ongoing efforts to summon The Great Again with Trump succumbing to Clintonism. Pence in our time.
Numerous leftist attorneys in the United States have for the moment shifted from ambulance chasing to airport sitting as they scour for test cases to attack Trump's executive orders concerning ingress into the United States. Hussein Bahamas appointee to the bench Anne Donnelly (WOT:nonperson) issued an order purporting by the media to stay a substantial portion of Trump's executive order while doing little of the sort. Much of the fake news media has taken to this development with nearly the enthusiasm they show for increasing leftist violence. Slate/WaPo/Amazon.com legal commentator Dahlia Lithwick (WOT:nonperson) supposed:
Donald Trump has no idea how terrifying a blue book1 and a Lexis2 password can be. He’s about to find out.
This is a very bullish indicator for metaphorical popcorn futures.3
News has emerged that Iraq is in violation of new OPEC production quotas and is actually independently increasing exports rather than decreasing exports in concert with its OPEC brothers. The Iraqi State Organization for Marketing of Oil which is shirking this agreement accuses the autonomous Kurdish region of over exportation. It remains to be seen how the rest of OPEC chooses to handle this precious snowflake.
Today Russian Ambassador to Turkey Andrei Karlov was shot dead by an assassin at an art gallery in Ankara. The assassin is alleged to be a local police officer who during the killing praised the name of his higher power, one he chooses to call Allah.
Due to the nature of the event a number of high quality photographs and videos of the attacker and the attack itself are circulating.
There is no credible news on the identity Mevlüt Mert Altıntaş has been identified as the shooter and his fate is still unknown at this time suggesting he is still at large and possibly being supported in his evasion of justice is in custody.
Two and a half miles away the United States embassy complex was shut down due to a "security incident". United States Lame Duck President Hussein Bahamas still enjoys a bit more than a month in office with which he can start a hot war with Russia.
ISIS retook the ancient city of Palmyra just hours after Russian airstrikes designed to drive them away from the city failed. (archived); ISIS occupied the 2000 year old site for 10 months until early this year, and destroyed many ancient temples and performed executions at the ruin sites. Palmyra is considered a strategic city because it lies along a route serving oil wells.
An alleged 12 to 14 year old suicide bomber killed 51 and wounded 69 at a wedding in southeast Turkey near the Syrian border (archived). The tween allegedly interupted the celebration by killing himself and others after the traditional "henna party" where hands and feet are painted. Peace in our time.
Turkey is undergoing some internal political turmoil. Peace in our time.
Three cities in Saudi Arabia were hit by suicide bombers yesterday. One of the sites targeted was near the Prophet's Mosque in the Muslim holy city of Medina. The implications of suicide bombers striking near the burial place of Muhammad as opposed to Paris, a gay bar, or social services center is left to the alert reader. Peace in our time.