Acute Pantsuit Inconsistency Shows Internal Disregard For Their Illusion of "Franchise"

On February 12, 2018:

The United States warned the Democratic Republic of Congo on Monday against using an electronic voting system for a long-delayed presidential election in December this year because it has the potential to undermine the credibility of the poll. U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations Nikki Haley told an informal U.N. Security Council meeting on the Congolese electoral process that deploying "an unfamiliar technology for the first time during a crucial election is an enormous risk."

Two days later:

Congressional Democrats introduced legislation on Wednesday that would provide more than $1 billion to boost cyber security of U.S. voting systems, and Vice President Mike Pence defended the administration’s efforts to protect polls from hackers…. "We cannot let the Russians laugh about and take joy in the success they had in the last election," Nancy Pelosi, the Democratic leader in the House of Representatives, told a news conference. "Their goal is to undermine democracy."

The hidden gem, of course being:

The Democrats’ Election Security Act would allocate $1 billion in grants, overseen by the U.S. Election Commission, this year to help states buy voting machines that incorporate backup paper ballots, hire security staff and conduct risk assessments.

That is to say: a lightly-cloaked mandate for the installation of Diebold-style "user friendly" mechanisms for untraceable ballot-stuffing in place of the traditional paper-punch machines which were reintroduced in a number of U.S. states following the 2004 "hanging chads" e-voting election. And, naturally, a quite-undisguised mandate for the institution of a centralized bureaucracy which will centrally supply properly kosher voting machines, centrally networked, which are to produce properly kosher, per the DNC's lights, electoral outcomes.

It would seem that USG now pushes one voodoo in one of its Congoes, and a polar-opposite hoodoo in the other, without – unsurprisingly – much in the way of an explanation.

Malware Exploiting Intel CPU Hardware Vunerabilities Being Found In The Wild

A series of exploits in Intel CPUs at the hardware level which were publicly revealed last month are now being targeted by malware in the wild. Microcode patches which reduce without completely mitigating the vulnerabilities reduce compute performance on affected chips drastically as the vulnerabilities are a consequence of "optimizations" Intel chose to pursue. [Source](archived)

Russia Erupts In Nazi Rifle Monument Scandal

A scandal has emerged in Russia after visitors to a new monument to Mikhail Kalashnikov noticed the monument featured a plaque engraved with the blueprints for a Nazi rifle (archived). The engraved schematics featured the German Sturmgewehr 44 which predates any alternative assault rifle designed by Mikhail Kalashnikov which could have been featured on the Russian military monument. The director of the Russian Mulitary Historical Society (RVIO) offered:

following the sculptor’s blunder everybody can see the StG and Kalashnikov are two different weapons.

Far Left Media Covers for Violent Even-Further-Left-ists Assault on Landscaping Vehicle

In the most recent chapter of "I can't believe how far they'll go to undermine their own credibility!", Jeff Bezos' Amazon Washington Post artlessly deploys the passive voice in its coverage of provincial stotting and other chimp activity.

A brief review of what passes for videography courtesy Maggie Vespa KGW1 in the service of American Journalism shows that where JBAWP reported "counterprotesters shouting at the driver", violent leftist elements clearly lobbed improvised ballistic lols at an iconic American landscaping vehicle (0:09), prompting its hasty retreat from a hostile work environment. After local deputies of the federal-gendarmerie-in-waiting2 stopped and extracted the vehicle's operator for forcing it through a red light against its will (4:10), the Violent Vanguard of the Left (in a scene eerily reminiscient of Stanly Kubrick's openeing sequence for 2001, A Space Odyssey) tentatively approached the idle vehicle, and assaulted the defenseless capital equipment.

Given the typical Redditor's underdeveloped upper body strength, the editorial staff of QNTRA expects the truck to make a speedy recovery, and haul itself back to its duties in the Great Again expediently and without complaint. Pence in our time.


  1. Journalists are gleefully leading the charge into Max Barry's utopia as described in "Jennifer Government", taking their employers brands for their own last names. 

  2. The Portland Police Bureau bent and spread proudly in 2014 to accomodate Federal encroachment into their sovereign right to mistreat populations the Pantsuit wishes to elevate out of the Untouchable caste. 

No Such lAbs Posts Positive Cashflow On Continued FUCKGOATS Sales

No Such lAbs reports their first month of positive cash flow in their August 2017 statement. This marks a milestone in the development of this New World business. There are no signs of any actual movement by fiat concerns to enter the business space occupied by the ascendant No Such lAbs.

Trezor, Others Affected By "Fault Injection" – May Leak Keys

A security flaw in Trezor hardware Bitcoin wallets can reveal users private keys, due to faulty STMicroelectronics chips used in the manufacture of the devices. While Trezor has released a fix for the hack detailed in this archived Medium post, the company – along with other hardware wallet manufacturers such as KeepKey – will continue to use chips from STMicroelectronics that may contain other fault injection vulnerabilities, and result in SFYL if Government agencies or other parties gain access to the device for even a short period of time. Trezor assured users that "everything is fine" and “coins are safe” provided devices are kept within reach of their owners since the glitch isn't a remote execution attack. A blog post on the trezor.io website promises that they will "publish a detailed report in the coming days".

The Dog Has Been Wagged: Trump Fires 60 Cruise Missiles Into Syrian Airfield's Pussy

US President Donald Trump has taken up the mantle of "warrior for babies" following an alleged sarin gas attack.1 In keeping with his announced deviation from the Hussein Bahamas era policy of announcing military strikes months in advance, Donald Trump ordered the launch of 60 Tomahawk cruise missiles straight into the pussy of a Syrian air base near Homs.

The USS Porter and USS Ross which launched the missiles appear to still be floating suggesting the ongoing Trump led populist regime change in the United States has placed limits on Russia's support for Syrian President Assad. It remains to be seen whether this event leads to US-Russian cooperation on the path towards "Make World Great Again", or if this leads to the abortion of ongoing efforts to summon The Great Again with Trump succumbing to Clintonism. Pence in our time.


  1. Potentially a convential attack on chemical munitions storage that lead to a containment breach. Media reports are conflicting on the nature of the event. 

Bitcoin Mining Difficulty Climbs ~7.43% In Latest Adjustment – Yet Another All Time High

The Bitcoin network mining difficulty has climbed to 422170566883.83685303 in an approximately 7.43% increase over the previous level. Two weeks ago, the last adjustment took the network mining difficulty up ~16.64% in move that represented a substantial purchases of computing equipment good at hashing double rounds of SHA256 and nothing else. As with most recent difficulty adjustments this is yet another all time high Bitcoin mining difficulty.