Vessenes Gox Drama Continues

Peter Vessenes (WOT:nonperson) of the failed Vessenes' Phoundation and failed start up Coinlab continues to stir the drama pot as he holds out hope that a court just might award him a portion of the insolvent Gox's corpse. Such a move would naturally represent the first, last, and best revenue received by Vessenes venture which promised much and delivered nothing.

Not Quite News Roundup Xtend 13 (TM)(R)

Welcome to the thirteenth edition of the Qntra Not Quite News Roundup Xtend (TM)(R). The below events are alleged to have happened, but they are decidedly innocent of newsworthiness.

  • After 108 years the Chicago Cubs won the World Series1 against the Cleveland Indians.
  • CNN fired contributor and interim Democratic party chair Donna Brazile for leaking debate questions to the Hillary Rodham-Clinton campaign.
  • Rumours of China banning Bitcoin tempered the recent bull run reported by fiat/Bitcoin interfaces though after settling it still requires ~711 United States dollars to acquire a whole Bitcoin via this route.
  • Enthusiasm for the Zcash/Z-Cash/ZNC altcoin has already faded as scheduled. Who knew it would only take another week of mining subsidies hitting the market to crash the price?
  • Donald Trump-Clinton was rushed off the campaign stage in Reno, Nevada by the Secret Service.
  • Playboy Playmate Dani Mathers faces charges relating to a "body shaming" incident.
  • The University of Missouri Football team lost their 11th consecutive game in conference play. The team is now set to lose every game in their conference for the first time since 1971. This follow the University surrendering to a strike by the football team last year.

Sorry for your loss.


  1. Despite the name this is not an international contest. In the last World Baseball Classic, an actual international contest, the Dominican Republic won while the United States was eliminated by Puerto Rice, an island it occupies.  

Mainstream Media: Clinton Emails Already "Baked In" To Polls

On this day, the ninth day before the United States presidential election, the talking heads of the United States mainstream media-political complex are in concert adopting a single position on the damage from the latest revelation of Clinton Criminality. Apparently the political damage to Hillary Rodham-Clinton from this latest news is already "baked in" to Hillary Rodham-Clinton's polling numbers, and this damage has been for some amount of time, perhaps even since the beginning of time itself.

This "baked in" theory spontaneously emerged among several dozen "independent" mainstream talking heads simultaneously. Naturally there is *no way* that this introduction of the "baked in" line could have been coordinated.

Fractured GOP Experiences Coup Attempt

Various members of the old guard of the GOP, a minor socialist party in the United States, are in the midst of a coup to replace their party's nominee Donald Trump-Clinton with his vice presidential candidate Mike Pence. This coup is receiving substantial assistance from the mainstream media in that country including outlets which function as organs of that country's major socialist party.

Fuelling this coup was a vice presidential debate which was scored as a unanimous victory for Mike Pence, and the coup is substantially assisted by the release of an 11 year old entertainment media interview where Trump-Clinton bragged in a somewhat coarse manner about picking up women. The interview was never previously broadcast, and at the same time the interview leaked excerpts of speeches where Hillary Rodham-Clinton called for open borders and a single hemispheric "free trade zone" were leaked to little fanfare.

America should have voted for America when it still had the chance. Personalities over policies, it's the American way.

Update: The Washington Post's online magazine is already declaring victory in their openly declared war to keep Donald Trump-Clinton from spoiling Hillary Rodham-Clinton's turn in the Ova[sic] Office.

Nigerian Students Scammed By Alabama State University

A group of 37 international students from Nigeria are suing Alabama State University over the school's practice of withholding scholarship funds sent by the Nigerian government for their benefit (archived). In their defense, the school alleges a mysterious official from the Nigerian government directed them not to disburse the remaining balance of the scholarships after tuition and required fees to the students. Per the conditions attached to the scholarships these funds were to be directed to the students so that they could pay their expenses incurred which are not billed by the university. The extent to which Alabama State managed to keep these students from accessing their scholarship funds however kept students from even paying tuition to take classes at the university during the summer term, because of instructions the University alleges it received from the mystery government official. The school further alleges the instructions directed returning surplus funds to a "Nigerian Government account." Sorry for your loss.

The "Your Loss" Playbook

Before we at Qntra can be sorry for your loss, someone else has to bake your loss first.When a "business" decides to live at the intersection of Bitcoin money and fiat currencies your loss tends to follow the same few steps. There may be a few variation on these steps depending on whether your chosen loser is BitInstant, MtGox, Mcxnow, Homero Garza, Buterin,1 or Bitfinex.

  1. Make, buy, or steal a thing to be calling your business. If you are a true pioneer like Intersango you make it. You buy it if you are Mt Gox or Butterfly Labs. If you are Bitfinex you just straight up steal it.2
  2. You start making noise. If you are Trendon Shavers you recruit "privileged insiders" to do your selling. If you are Butterfly Labs you buy a bunch of advertising. If you are Homero Garza you buy advertising from all the media outlets and do a bit of the privileged insider thing.
  3. You build some history for either spectacular returns and reliability. You paper over the complaints with lies and declarations of "This is just how we do things" to justify the insanity. You lean on your loyal bought and paid for noisemakers3 to toe your party line.
  4. Your Loss, we are sorry.4
  5. When the complaints get too loud the payment processor and all manner of accessories to the scheme start getting scapegoated. Mt Gox had Dwolla. BitInstant had numerous payment processors to blame. At this point the existence of the loss is clear, but some effort is made to conceal the loss is yours.
  6. Tokens! A market for them! See MtGox Bitcoins on Bitcoin Builder, BFX Tokens on Bitfinex, and the entire Paycoin scheme that emerged when GAW could no longer hold up the pretense of mining.
  7. The pretense is suddenly lifted. Every one is sorry for your loss.

History rhymes and this is the story of your losses. Just like the various color revolutions, your loss follows a pattern. We're sorry.


  1. The various altcoin scams invariably end up actually being fiat/Bitcoin interface scams when the scammers need to eat off of customer deposits and pimp their rides. 

  2. preferably from another scam that too moribund to care at the time  

  3. Roger Ver and Andreas Derpolopolis are very popular and affordable choices.  

  4. The steps following this case can be skipped in the event of Trendon Shavers  

Not Quite News Roundup Xtend (TM)(R)

Welcome to the Qntra Not quite News Roundup Xtend (TM)(R). Below are collected things that happened this week which did not independently achieve newsworthiness:

  • The United States Marshalls service announced another auction, this time only ~3 Bitcoins constituting the pot were stolen from Ross Ulbrict. The remainder come from other cases.
  • Gawker Media has celebrated their last week before becoming part of Ziff Davis by pantomiming the high school tradition of "Senior Week" and by opening an online "Men's Magazine" called "The Cuck." The Cuck's first post was:

    The Politics of Sitting Down To Pee

  • Bitfinex reopened trading as was planned. Trading included their non-consensual debt instrument.
  • Tradehill's Jared Kenna opened yet another Bitcoin "dark trading" pool.
  • Coinbase has continued their apology and solvency tour repeatedly offering that the number of Classic Ethereum tokens they lost was 40,000 United States dollars, a number denominated in a unit other than that of the actual things they lost.
  • The Huffington Post's David Seaman started off a round of Herpity Derping that supposes Barry Silbert did Ethereum Classic.
  • Barry Silbert's Coindesk announced plans to double its staff (archived).

Bitfinex Embraces Socialism In Losing

Buttfinex released yet another cryptic statement this evening, calling the so-called hack a "socialized loss" which likely translates into more sorry for your loss for their customers. The statement simply said there are no hard figures yet officially released, but the company promised an amended FAQ and more information regarding the extent of the breach tomorrow. Bitfinex, making socialism great again since 2013.

Bitfinex Breaks: Fiat Exchange That Never Had Anything To Do With Bitcoin Finally Goes Away

To quote from 2013 :

MPOE-PR AvatarI. Self-moderated "support thread", filled with a bunch of socks posting nonsense. This is standard scammer operating procedure.
II. Running stolen, bug ridden software (the old Bitcoinica codebase) that has already proven itself useless in the marketplace (three times!)
III. Scammers themselves admit to crediting "investors" infinite USD/BTC to execute the naive users.
It's true that scammer tags aren't really given out much anymore, but that's no reason to allow well known scammers run amok. You have been warned.

To quote from 2016 :

We are investigating the breach to determine what happened, but we know that some of our users have had their bitcoins stolen. We are undertaking a review to determine which users have been affected by the breach. While we conduct this initial investigation and secure our environment, bitfinex.com will be taken down and the maintenance page will be left up.

Sorry for your loss.

Coinbase Engineering Director Jokes That Roger VERified Their Coins Are Safe

Coinbase Director of Engineering Charles Lee1 (WOT:coblee) today joked on Twitter that Roger Ver has VERified the Coinbase coins are safe. Roger similarly VERified that the coins at Mt Gox were safe and present in their reserves up until the moment Mt Gox died and even then for a bit of time after that. The history of Roger VERified jokes stretches back to December of 2012.

In December 2012 Roger Ver (WOT:nonperson) used his access to the administrative panel of Blockchain.info in order to compromise the supposedly secret information of a user of that service following a dispute over a payment error made by an unrelated venture of Roger Ver's (archived). The payment error was for 4.5119 Bitcoin, an amount that summed to less than 50 United States dollars at a time when buying that amount of Bitcoin was still an easy task.2

Compounding Roger Ver's mistake was his attempt at a cover up insisting that he was a sufficiently special snowflake to have all threads discussing the matter retitled, locked,  and deleted (archived). At the time MPOE-PR (WOT:hanbot) wrote of his efforts:

We're not discussing the "change the thread title" part of your statement. We're discussing the "better yet, lock the thread and ask the mods to delete it" part of your statement.

It is not this thread that is causing undue alarm. The alarm is very much due, this BS of divulging customer details is widespread to the point of universality. Aurum did it, MtGox did it, the list is pretty much "everyone except MPEx". This has to cease, universally, as it has no place in BTC.

The other thing that has to cease is the unwarranted delusions of self importance. You personally are not great enough to request moderators to delete the signs of your stupidity "so as not to harm bitcoin". Should you want to request it, do it in the adequate terms, which are "I've been really stupid, please delete this before it ruins my reputation".

That aside, you personally are not big enough to harm Bitcoin, for one, and moreover this "too big to fail" mentality and the corresponding expectation of throwing everything to the wind for the sake of propping up random doods with self-awarded VIP status is completely irrational.

Since the Blockchain.info episode Roger Ver has continued his pursuit of pennies at the expense of potential fortunes. He publicly defended the insovlent Mt Gox, engaged in premature passport shennanigans that greatly restricted his ability to travel, further sold his illusion of credibility in the XTCoin and ClassicCoin pushes, and jumped on the ether huffing train shortly before their huffing bag detonated. Sorry for your Roger VERified loss.


  1. Of "Litecoin" infamy. Litecoin was this "better Bitcoin" endorsed by Wired Magazine in August 2013 much like DogeCoin and Ethereum would later be "better Bitcoins" endorsed by mainstream media rags until they sunk.  

  2. It was indeed less that four years ago that a person could acquire 5 whole Bitcoins for less than the price of a nice restaurant meal.