Fickle Fiat: Twenty Year Old Social Media User Knocks 1.3 Billion USD Off Snapchat Market Cap

After Kim Kardashian's 20 year old sister Kylie Jenner announced she doesn't really use Snapchat anymore, traders on the NYSE began dumping shares of the application's parent company Snap Inc. More than 1.3 billion Unified Standard Dosiedos in value has been shaved off the social media firm.

Buttfunder Founder Montroll Arrested

The U.S. Department of [in]Justice has arrested the founder of BitFunder, Jon Montroll (WOT:nonperson) – better known as Ukyo – in response to an investigation by The FBI and the Securities and Exchange Commission. BitFunder was an early Bitcoin "securities exchange" that saw around 6000 BTC liberated from it's coffers due to a bug that allowed attackers to credit themselves funds among other lulz. The announcement on the Department of [in]Justice website alleges that Montroll lied to SEC investigators in 2013 when questioned in regards to company finances after the hack, while depositing some of his own coins to BitFund in an effort to conceal the SFYL. Mr. Montroll has been charged with two counts of perjury and a single count of obstruction of justice.

BTC-E Down Owner Appears Headed For USG "Coke Machine" Treatment As Fiatist Thefts Continue

Long time semi-independent fiat/Bitcoin interface BTC-E has gone down with its apparent operator captured by USG and Greek pederast forces. The Stasi's press representatives are alleging that BTC-E laundered 4 billion United States dollars since 2011, this is in spite of BTC-E trading multiple tokens in addition to Bitcoin with one of the most volatile being the United States dollar. This suggests the Stasi pulled the 4 Billion dollar figure out of someone's ass to defend their favored scamcoin's honor.

This move follows the death earlier this month of Alexandre Cazes, the alleged proprietor of AlphaBay, who appears to have been killed by one of the Stasi's attempts to capture Bitcoin value via the "coke machine" method. Perhaps the Stasi feels that partnering with the Greek pederasts, with their legendary Hellenic loving touch, might give this latest captive enough life to spit out the private keys.

The fiatists continue thrashing.

fiat/Bitcoin Interfaces Testing US dollar At 1/1400th Bitcoin Price Level

The bulk of fiat centered fiat/Bitcoin interfaces are testing a price that would drop the value of a United States dollar to 1/1400th of a Bitcoin on their markets. The malaise affecting fiat currencies has kept the dollar trading under 1/1000th of a Bitcoin for most of 2017. At the present fiat/Bitcoin interfaces which are outliers from the pack include BTCChina which has illegally cooperated with the PBOC to stop Bitcoin outflows while still allowing fiat outflows leaving it a laggard where a dollar is still a whopping 1/1180th of a Bitcoin, simply for the reason that a dollar can be taken off of their troubled platform. Bitfinex is also an outlier in the other direction where a dollar is a mere 1/1497th of a Bitcoin as it goes through Goxian death pains.

Purdue University Bails Out Bezos Bezzle Bungle

Purdue University has acquired the liabilities associated with Kaplan University's online credential issuing programs by paying a single dollar1 to Jeff Bezos' Graham Holdings.2 Purdue is a degree mill sponsored by the government of Indiana and headed by former Indiana governor Mitch Daniels. Information on any personal considerations given to agents allegedly acting on behalf of Purdue University in order to relieve Jeff Bezos balance sheet of this toxic asset while further paying for the fucking is unavailable at this time.


  1. too many  

  2. Formerly known as the Washington Post company  

"Terror In Their Hearts" Syrian Refugees Settled In North Saint Louis Seek New Refugee Status Due To Neighbourhood Violence

This week Saint Louis radio station KMOX allegedly received a letter from Syrian refugees settled in North Saint Louis which they translated as stating the refugees had "terror in their hearts" following a home invasion. Further allegations per the radio station's aired portions of the translation include:

  • The locals who participated in the home invasion expressed interest in abducting their children.
  • When they go out in public pictures are taken of their children by the locals.
  • They are afraid to leave their home due to the ambient level of violence in the neighborhood.

KMOX radio host Charlie Brennan who presented the allegations in the letter has yet to publish the full letter in a legible venue, but local police dispute details including the fixation on the children as a cultural misunderstanding. The home invasion and extraordinary ambient level of violence however are in line with other reports from the North Saint Louis conflict zone. Brennan proposed resettling now double refugees in Ballwin, Missouri.

The Syrian refugees were resettled in the North Saint Louis conflict zone by the "International Institute of Saint Louis", an immigration and refugee settlement organization aligned with leftist political causes and located in the trendy, hip Tower Grove East neighborhood of Saint Louis City.

Balance Of Buttfunex "Cold Storage" Address Down 50 kiloBitcoin And Falling

Bitfinex death watch continues with the address declared to be their "cold storage" down 50,000 Bitcoins and counting. This comes as Buttfunex's fait banking partners have ceased processing fiat withdrawals from this fiat emphasized fiat/Bitcoin interface. Sorry for your loss… butt fun while it lasted.

US President Trump Hosts Press Conference And Reviews Action Packed First Month

United States President Donald Trump held his first solo press conference on the job and offered a comprehensive review of his action packed first month in office. Trump promised further action in the coming weeks as he celebrated a busy first month in spite of the fake news media, hostile career bureaucrats, and a slate of department secretaries delayed by an obstructionist legislature. A transcript of the press conference is presented below: Continue reading