Yiannopoulos Quits Media Giant Breitbart

Today tech editor Milo Yiannopoulos quit United States media giant Breitbart after a video became public where Yiannopoulos related that his experience being molested by a member of the clergy wasn't that bad. The moribund press expended substantial column inches condemning the libertine comments as they conducted an organized campaign of oppression against the homosexual Yiannopoulos. Yiannopoulos tendered his resignation to Breitbart media as a result of this harassment campaign.

Meanwhile Breitbart Media, a venture which outlasted founder Andrew Breitbart, has grown to surpass Disney's ESPN in internet audience size according to Alexa.1


  1. For what little Alexa is worth.  

NZ High Court: Kim Dotcom Extradition Eligible

"Justice" Murray Gilbert of the High Court of New Zealand upheld the lower court's decision by Nevin Dawson that Kim Dotcom is eligible for extradition to the United States. Gilbert noted that "criminal copyright infringement" of the sort criminally marketed by the United States is not a crime in New Zealand. Gilbert instead supposed that "general criminal law fraud" was a sufficiently vague label to abuse in making Kim Dotcom extraditable.

It's Not Rape If Her Uterus Meanwhile Absorbed It

Novel legal theory unveiled (in a whitepaper, of course) by obscure scamcoin Zcoin's own Reuben Yak earlier today explains that even through "an unknown party" made away with anywhere between 410% and ∞% of the marketable value of the whole shebang nevertheless it's all good because of the market having absorbed the damage or in other words because the damage was mostly absorbed by the markets.

Sorry for your rights, priviledges, sanity and loss, in some order that was already absorbed by this text.

McDonald's Exposes Nuts After Hiatus

Exposed nuts are again to be seen around McDonald's restaurants worldwide, as the company reverses an order that required peanuts and nuts to be served in individually wrapped containers. The move is a blow to sufferers of persons with nut allergies who had long benefited from the policy. A statement from the company said "All products available at our restaurants may contain or come into contact with peanuts, tree nuts or other allergens".

McDonald's employees worldwide are now free to liberally sprinkle nuts on any dessert, although a local franchise assured me they plan to keep their nuts wrapped for the time being.

US President Trump Hosts Press Conference And Reviews Action Packed First Month

United States President Donald Trump held his first solo press conference on the job and offered a comprehensive review of his action packed first month in office. Trump promised further action in the coming weeks as he celebrated a busy first month in spite of the fake news media, hostile career bureaucrats, and a slate of department secretaries delayed by an obstructionist legislature. A transcript of the press conference is presented below: Continue reading

US National Security Advisor Michael Flynn Blackmailed Into Resignation By US "Deep State"

US National Security Advisor Michael Flynn submitted his resignation tonight after being blackmailed by unnamed elements within the "National Security" bureaucracy. An unidentified group or individual with access to wire tapped phone conservations of Flynn's leaked insinuations to the self described press. Flynn erred in his handling of the blackmail by failing to be honest with Vice President Mike Pence. This would constitute the first substantive blow to the Trump administration by the "deep state" bureaucracy, but it had the benefit of removing the least reliable member of Trump's cabinet. Pence in our time.

Resistance Leader's Wife And Stepson Charged After Body Found

A body alleged to belong to Missouri resistance leader Frank Ancona was found in the Big River1 by fishermen according to local press reports. St. Francois County Prosecutor Jarrod Mahurin has filed charges against Ancona's wife and stepson accusing them of murdering the patriarch.


  1. The actual proper name of the body of water and not a euphamism for the legitimately large Missouri or Mississippi Rivers.  

Amid Increased Leftist Violence In US, Local Resistance Leader Disappears In Missouri

Frank Ancona, a man who has publicly been described as a leader of the Traditionalist American Knights of the Ku Klux Klan, has been missing since Wednesday according to his wife and local police (archived). His car was found abandoned in remote Washington County, Missouri. Most publicity for Ancona's avocation has come from local leftist rags,1 which repeatedly vilified Ancona and his organization over the years for their public information campaigns. The increase in US leftist violence which began shortly after the election of President Trump raises substantial concerns of foul play.


  1. Notably Joseph Pulitzer's own paper, the St Louis Post Dispatch.  

ZCash Sinks After Bug Induced Chain Fork

Zooko's ZCash suffered a severe setback today, initial reports calling it "chain fork" that occurred due to using an old version of the "anonymous" software. Zooko advised users to update to the latest release in order to avoid any potential problems, but "further analysis" of the bug would be released, likely to assure users the scam isn't collapsing prematurely as they try to figure out what happened. Prices on the bologna exchange Poloniex slid to $33 USD per coin, listed at #18 in the coinmarketcap.com ranking of scamcoins, dipping below even other obvious scams such as Steemit and Dogecoin. (archived)