'Anti-Racist' Football Tournament Cancelled After Racist Violence Between Refugee Teams

The United Colours Antifa Street Soccer Cup in Zwickau, Germany was cancelled after racist violence broke out between a primarily Arab and a primarily African team. The event's organizers are self declared Antifa terrorists and describe the competition as a demonstration that Zwickau is not for "racism and every type of discrimination", a mission statement the involved players must have failed to comprehend before the game broke down into a cacophony of racist violence.

UK Court Issues No Sanctions Over Gross Violations Of Surveillance Law

In Britain the Investagatory Powers Tribunal has found that MI5 and GCHQ have spent 15 years grossly violating section 94 of the local Telecommunications act through their cable tapping programs (archived). The tribunal's president Michael Burton however found no reason for anything to be done citing a word salad of bureaucratic wank.

Copyrasts Pushing For Prosecutions Over Vote Outcome

Texas based music industry lawyer Chris Castle is calling for criminal prosecutions over a "European Parliament" vote that failed to approve measures supported by his clients (archived). Expect application of the "prosecute votes we don't like" strategy to continue to grow in application after the unsuccessful "Russian interference" whining failed to gain anything other than so called mindshare in loyal subjects of the "our democracy". As in the failed attempt to delegitimize Trump's election, this effort is largely a case of foreigners attempting to change the outcome of a vote after the fact.

South African Government Refusing Documents For Refugees Resettling Elsewhere

A white South African farmer's efforts to resettle permamently in Russia are being thwarted by South African bureaucrats refusing to provide documentation to allow him to complete an application for permanent residency (archived). The farmer has been spending the majority of his time in Paris while the plight of his people in their homeland continues.

Hollywood Pervert Purge Continues As Pantsuits Enact Gunn Control

As Hollywood's latest morality panic continues, Disney has sacked "Guardians of the Galaxy" director James Gunn over tweets labeled "pedophilic" (archived, archived). For months Hollywood has been gutting its ranks as decades of grudges have been aired all at once. Gunn was set to begin filming a third installment of the lucrative franchise for Disney before he was shamed over olds tweets about his love for a film titled 100 Pubescent Girls Touch Themselves among other things.

San Francisco Mayor Overwhelmed By Street Shitting In First Interview After Taking Office

San Francisco Mayor London Breed has expressed shock at the amount of human feces on the city's sidewalks during her first interview since taking office (archived, archived). Her proposed solution is pressuring non-profits organizations enabling the city's homeless population to educate their charges about hygiene and "cleaning up after themselves".

Remains Of Gawker Media Back On The Sales Block

Univision is fishing for offers to take the remains of the Gawker Media Group, now called the Gizmodo Media Group off their hands (archived). Univision bought the former Gawker properties back in 2016 apparently hoping to find synergy between their core Latino audience and Gawker's audience of urban Soylent Socialists. Following recent layoffs, writers on the site have taken to publishing pieces on Univision's dime begging for new ownership to buy them out.

Commercial Ship Faces Siege At Sea After Rescuing African Migrants

The crew of the ship Vos Thalassa has barricaded themselves on the bridge after a number of Africans rescued at sea began trying to seize control of the ship (archived). The commercial vessel rescued 60 African migrants at sea in the Libyan coast guard's area of responsibility. Being a commercial cargo vessel and not a vessel run by an organization dedicated to building a Nation of Africa in Europe, the cargo vessel issued its own distress call when the migrants took poorly to the prospect of being disembarked in Libya.

Vos Thalassa is an Italian flagged offshore supply vessel currently supporting oil and gas operations for the French firm Total (archived).