More Than A Week After Ransomware Strike US Municipality Remains Crippled

Stories leaking out of Atlanta suggest that the local government is still crippled more than a week after succumbing to ransomware (archived). Ransomware has been a common part of the internet landscape since spring 2013 yet large organizations in the United States remain woefully unequipped to survive.

Gold Diggers Take Grace Mugabe's Farm As Precedent Of Uncompensated Land Seizure Turns on The Mugabes

Reports out of the former Rhodesia indicate that recently deposed first lady Grace Mugabe's farm has a pest control problem with numerous orchards and fields uprooted by goldminers (archived). Mugabe and her husband's regime oversaw the uncompensated seizure of land including the farm currently occupied by an estimated 400 gold diggers from white farmers.

Boeing Production Hit By Ransomware Using USG.NSA Exploits

Reports are emerging that aerospace giant Boeing's production process has been crippled by malware utilizing exploits farmed by the United States NSA. According to local media reports the ransomware outbreak has crippled commercial airline production equipment and an effect on military products production is likely though unmentioned in the popular press (archived).

Pantsuit Disarmament March Eclipsed In Popular Headlines By Opposition From Musicians: Killa Mike And Bataclan Survivor Jesse Hughes Call For Sanity

A disarmament march carried out by young pantsuits supporting citizen disarmament in the United States was overshadowed in the Pantsuit media this weekend by celebrity opposition. The trend was started by a National Rifle Association interview with beloved gangsta rapper Killer Mike who attacked young gun grabbers as 'progressive lackeys' and 'not woke' working to 'progress us into slavery' (archived).

This was followed today by pantsuit pearl clutching in outrage against Bataclan terror attack survivor Jesse Helms who compared people opposing their own gun ownership because of violence to men chopping off their own dicks to stop rape. Helms further accused the student activists the pantsuit march was centered around of exploiting their classmates' deaths for Facebook likes (archived).

Nine Citizens of Iran Given the Honour of Inclusion in USG.FBI's 'Wanted List'

On Friday, March 23, USG once more indulged its recently-acquired taste for indicting in absentia loyal soldiers of a sovereign nation — this time, nine signals-intelligence professionals residing in, and lawful citizens of, Iran. For carrying out their duties in service to their sovereign, USG saw it fit to charge (archived OCR) them in USG kangaroo court with the USG.crime of "Conspiracy to Commit Computer Intrusions".

For the role of "victims" of this "crime", USG chief prosecutor Rosenstein cast:

"… 144 U.S. universities, 176 universities across 21 foreign countries, 47 domestic and foreign private sector companies, the U.S. Department of Labor, the Federal Energy Regulatory Commission, the State of Hawaii, the State of Indiana, the United Nations, and the United Nations Children’s Fund",

from whom the "criminals" have "stolen" "…more than 31 terabytes of academic data and intellectual property".

Interestingly, the most unforgivable USG.crime committed by the accused appears to have been a successful attempt to… re-create, in-house, "SciHub":

"The members of the conspiracy used stolen account credentials to obtain unauthorized access to victim professor accounts, which they used to steal research, and other academic data and documents, including, among other things, academic journals, theses, dissertations, and electronic books. The defendants targeted data across all fields of research and academic disciplines, including science and technology, engineering, social sciences, medical, and other professional fields. The defendants stole at least approximately 31.5 terabytes of academic data and intellectual property, which they exfiltrated to servers outside the United States that were under the control of members of the conspiracy… …Megapaper sold stolen academic resources to customers within Iran, including Iran-based public universities and institutions, and Gigapaper sold a service to customers within Iran whereby purchasing customers could use compromised university professor accounts to directly access the online library systems of particular U.S.-based and foreign universities."

I.e. roughly the same act of "terrorism" for which Aaron Swartz was hanged in New York in 2013.

It is worth noting that, while USG at one time, not so long ago, had "long hands" in Iran, these hands have recently acquired a tendency to get abruptly shortenedIranian-style. Therefore it remains unclear how, if at all, USG intends to bring the nine "criminals" to "justice". And one may safely suppose that the only people likely to hang in connection to this "conspiracy"… are the remaining USG moles in Iran, who supplied Rosenstein and his assistant Freislers with their "evidence".

"31337 w4r3z" in our time.

Moves In Trump Administration Signal The Remains Of The US Moving Into A More Aggressive Posture

In pursuit of the Great Again, US President Donald Trump has retained noted advocate of blowing shit up in pursuit of regime change John Bolton as his National Security Adviser. The Iraq war relic's hiring along with recent overtures to trade wars suggest the path to The Great Again is narrowing.

Rising African Political Star Criticises "Poor" Australia: "No Black People To Exploit"

Rising South African political star Julius Malema has criticised Australian Home Minister Peter Dutton for offering white South African farmers a place of refuge from racism in their home country. Malema insisted Australia lacks the necessary amount of exploitable black people necessary for white farmers to avoid poverty. Malema offered the following concerns with respect to the plight of his white agragrian countrymen:

If they want to go, they must go. They must leave the keys to their tractors because we want to work the land, they must leave the keys to their houses because we want to stay in those houses.

Don’t make noise, because you will irritate us. Go to Australia. It is only racists who went to Australia when Mandela got out of prison. It is only racists who went to Australia when 1994 came. It is the racists again who are going back to Australia.

They are rich here because they are exploiting black people. There is no black person to be exploited in Australia, they are going to be poor.

They will come back here with their tail between their legs. We will hire them because we will be the owners of their farms when they come back to South Africa. As to what we are going to do with the land, it’s our business, it’s none of your business.

We want Africa back. Africa belongs to our people. (archived)

 

Malema is the major opposition figure to South African president Cyril Ramaphosa who last month pushed through measures to allow white African land to be taken without compensation.

 

USG Whispers Pleas Of "War On Terror" And "Special Operations Command" In MikroTik Router Shitware Case

In the absence of firm admissions of guilt, known USG influence outlets including Conde Nast publications are pleaing that the malware pushed into phuctorable MikroTik routers was part of a US Special Operations Command anti-Terrorism effort (archived, archived). Presumably this is part of the terrorist Pantsuit USG campaign to creating dialogue points for shifting the overton window on shitware.

Saif Ghaddafi Attempting Libyan Presidential Campaign 7 Years After Pantsuit Murdered His Father And Plunged Libya Into Chaos

Seven years after Pantsuit Hillary Rodham Clinton threw Libya into chaos and caused the murder of Libyan leader Colonel Muammar Gaddafi, son Saif Al-Islam Gaddafi is attempting a presidential campaign to bring stability back to Libya. The 45 year old scion of the late Libyan leader is rumoured to be in exile successfully evading all manner of "summons" and "indictments" including an in absentia death sentence ordered by a local pantsuit puppet court (archived). Until June 2017 Saif Gaddafi had been continusly in the custody of the local militia which captured him in 2011. Said militia refused to carry out the July 2015 in absentia death sentence and released Gaddafi for reasons uncertain at present.

Five Days After Erection "100 Year" Pedestrian Bridge Collapses In Florida

This week a pedestrian bridge with an advertised "100 Year Lifespan" collapsed on its fifth day post erection. Architectural features of the bridge included concrete trusses and a concrete roof for aesthetic effect. The bridge collapsed onto an active roadway. Six cadavers have been recovered from the rubble so far (archived).