African Bus Arsonist Who Tried To Burn 50 Italian Children In His Care Blames Wops For Not Letting More Of His People In

Afro-supremacist Ousseynou Sy, who tried to burn 50 Italian children under his care as a bus driver back in March has claimed that he is not to blame for his attempted holocaust. Instead he asserts that former Italian Interior Minister Matteo Salvini is to blame for implementing policies discouraging African migration to Italy (archived). Sy claimed the policies contributed to the deaths of Africans despite reported drowning deaths actually declining during the period they were in effect. Salvini has since lost the Interior Ministry after his party's coalition with the Five Star Movement was replaced by a coalition between Five Star and a legacy Pantsuitist party. Unrepentant and without any legal defense, Sy claims he would burn busses full of children "a hundred times" to avenge his African fellow travelers.

Airstrip One: Labour Party Suffers Greatest Collapse Since 1935, Unlikely To Recover

Elections in the British Queendom have delivered the Labour Party's greatest loss since 1935 as the Tories take 364 seats in parliament to Labour's paltry 203. Other parties managed to grab 82 seats with the separatist Scottish National Party taking 48 seats on their platform of divorcing the Queendom. Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has stated his intention to step down early after the Tories captured seats from working class strongholds that tradtionally voted Labour. As in the US, working class voters in the UK appear to have soured on Left parties as the onward march of Pantsuitism is evermore removed from anything they can relate to.

A far smaller number of traditionally Tory districts were won by the local labour candidate in rare situations where an absolute majority of the vote was split between Tory and Brexit Party candidates. This election's results give incumbent Prime Minister Boris Johnson a mandate to Brexit in the manner of his own choosing. The election also serves a stark rebuke to former prime minister Theresa May's wing of the Tory party which failed to Brexit after taking the verbal output of their Labour rivals and a hostile media seriously.

Hell Freezing Over: AFL-CIO Endorses Trump Trade Agreement

AFL-CIO boss and de facto leader of the US labor movement Richard Trumpka announced this week that the organization would be endorsing the trade agreement US President Donal Trump has pushed as a replacement for NAFTA (archived). As Pantsuitist opposition candidates challenging Trump continue to wank over intersectionality and other matters of concern only to ever smaller interest groups, the local labor movement's pivot towards Trump and MAGA suggests the leadership is catching up to their critically endangered blue collar membership's preferences.

One Week After Grave Vulnerability Revealed, WireGuard Moving Into Linux Kernel For 5.6

Linux kernel network stack maintainer and GCC steering committee member David S. Miller has committed WireGuard VPN into the net-next tree all but assuring that the VPN software will become part of the Linux 5.6 kernel release (archived). This comes less than one week after revelations that most VPN implementations, including WireGuard, are vulnerable to session hijacking on most *nix network stacks. At this time WireGuard is being implemented into kernel as a standalone module with CONFIG_WIREGUARD and CONFIG_WIREGUARD_DEBUG menu options.

Linus Torvalds stepped down from his former position actively shaping Linux kernel development back in September 2018 after he took his intersectional daughter's suggestions seriously.

Oracle Sues US Department Of Labor Over Existence Of "Administrative Courts"

Oracle is suing the USG Department of Labor over the existence of the Department's "administrative courts" where Oracle is being sued for alleged pay discrimination (archived). Since 2017 the Department of Labor has been suing the firm over an alleged 400 million USD underpayment of wages to women and colored people. Oracle's response this week raises the Department's stake in attempting to innovate new common law by cutting at the dubious constitutional legitimacy of the administrative court itself.

Unnamed "experts" inside the zone are writing off the possibility Oracle's suit suceeds in trimming the US federal bureaucracy as "unlikely" in comments to Pantsuitist media though in a common law system, anything can happen without regard for what the laws actually say. An Oracle win would gut this particular system and provide precedent for cutting at numerous other "administrative" dockets.

Some Key Stealing Libraries Found in Python Package Index

Two key stealing libraries were found in the PyPi Python Package Index (archived).  One mimicked the dateutil library by prepending a "python3-" so that suckers could stumble into python3-dateutil. The other, mimicked the jellyfish library but swapped a lowercase L for a capital i. Both were allegedly uploaded by the same user and exfiltrated data to the same destination. This is not the first time PyPi has had to remove malware mimicking popular packages, but they remain open to all comers and continue to exercise little actual control over the namespace they index.

Chicago Police Chief Fired

Chicago Police Chief Eddie Johnson was fired by Mayor Lori Lightfoot today (archived). Allegations of deception concerning an October episode where Johnson was found sleeping in his car are being presented as the reason for his firing. Johnson had already been scheduled to retire in several weeks. Anything less than a felony conviction will preserve the burden he presents to the insolvent pension system in Illinois.

Notably Johnson was the highest level official in the city of Chicago advocating for the prosecution of hate hoaxer Jussie Smollet. Instead, the 16 felony charges Jussie was indicted for by a Grand Jury were administratively dropped.

Inclusion Collision: Airstrip One Court Chooses Homosex Over Islam As Diversities Collide!

A "high court" judge in the United Queendom has decided to impose a permanent ban on protests outside a Birmingham primary school (archived). The Islamic protesters were unhappy with decisions by the school and Birmingham's local council which subjects their young children to "a gay ethos" in conflict with the religious beliefs they and 1.8 billion other persons around the world submit to.

In siding with the Government backed "gay ethos" and marginalizing the protester's active submission to Allah, the presiding judge used a relatively recent "common law" innovation promoted by Pantsuitists. The judge declared that the protesters "misunderstood" the content of the lessons they were protesting, and then he burdened them with a permanent ban on protests and 80% of the court costs incurred by the case.

Birmingham's Pantsuitist "director of education and skills" declared that the ruling offers protection from "escalating levels of anti-social behaviour". To this end the ruling lifted a previous ban on protesting the school through social media, likely with the aim of containing the feared "anti-social" action to readily discounted platforms, and the collision of groups celebrated for their diveristy and inclusion may be written of as a mere misunderstanding rather than the actual, live dispute that it is for a few minutes longer.

US FCC To Cut "Rural Internet" Funds As Half Assed Trade War Continues

The USG's FCC has decided to disallow new purchases of network gear made by Chinese firms Huawei and ZTE by recipients of "Universal Service Fund" subsidies though they have not yet made any firm decisions on whether recipients of these subsidies will be compelled to rip out any existing network gear (archived). The Universal Service fund was nominally established to encourage building telecom infrastructure in rural areas, but in practice it more frequently places ObamaPhones into the hands of the urban poor.

Efforts by the USG to engage in an actual trade war with China have been substantially hampered by US dependence on Chinese industry, particularly in propping up the illusion of the US having its own technology sector. So far the only major casualty on the Chinese side has been kidnapped Huawei CFO Meng Wanzhou.

Lizzy's Queendom Defies Mauritius And United Nations To Continue Illegal Occupation Of Chagos Islands

The United Queendom has let a UN deadline to surrender control of the Chagos Islands to Mauritius pass after the UN International Court of Justice ruled Lizzy's continued occupation of the islands illegal. The UN General Assembly approved the dealine to vacate with a 116 to 6 vote (archived). Mauritius was compelled to trade the islands for their independence back in 1965, the 13th year Liz wore the crown.

Lizzie began renting out the largest island in the group, Diego Garcia, for USG use as an unsinkable aircraft carrier in the Indian Ocean a mere 3 years later. Construction on the island to carrier conversion was delayed 4 years in order for depopulation efforts to rid the island of its previous inhabitants.