Tim Draper: Theranos Targeted By "Conspiracy"

Sometime United States Marshal's service auction winner and self described "venture capitalist" Tim Draper is alleging that his pet investment Theranos is the victim of a conspiracy. Headed by Elizabeth Holmes and attracting investors like Henry Kissenger, surgeon and former US Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist and further having incoming US Secretary of Defense James 'Mad Dog' Mattis having served on the board, Theranos must in Draper's mind have been the target of an organized conspiracy instead of the victim of its own fraud and incompetence. Sorry for your loss.

Ether.camp Breaks Out In Cheating Accusations After Huffing Orgy

War broke out in Ether.camp this week when one of the participating parties accused another party of cheating. Artchain members say that ether.camp awarded the $50,000 prize from the competition to coindash.io, whom they maintain used vote rigging and other underhanded tactics to game their position in the hackathon standings. Social media users could vote for their favorite team in the competition via "likes" on facebook or twitter and could also signal their support for a particular team by sending ETH to a designated address. Artchain alleges that some sort of bot was used to garner votes by coindash and that ether.camp organizers may have been complicit in the scheme. If the allegations prove true, this would be the second major issue to surface for the platform this month, after it was discovered that their "Hacker Gold Token" contained a critical bug that required a complete rewrite.

Police Clear Weapons Caches In DC Parks Ahead Of Trump Inauguration

Police officers in Washington DC are sweeping area parks and cleaning up the numerous weapons caches and dead drops ahead of the Trump Inauguration on Friday. Mainstream news sources are reporting that the cleanup began after a pedestrian called police to report a violin case filled with guns, which then led to the more thorough sweep of the local park system. Pence in our time.

Hussein Bahamas Commutes Sentence Of Chelsea (born Bradley) Manning

Hussein Bahamas today announced he would be commuting the 35 year prison sentence imposed upon Chelsea (born Bradley) Manning. The move likely to bring joy to LGTBQOMGWTFBBQ activists comes as former Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff and fellow USG secret leaker General James 'Hoss' Cartwright was offered a full pardon for his leakcrime.1 While Manning will still continue to be imprisoned until May, Hoss Cartwright with no known gender identity issues or special interest groups to appease is completely free of continued sanctions imposed by the criminal gang running the swamp. With only days before being replaced in office by the President Elect, Hussein Bahamas is clearly checking priviledge on his way out.

  1. Hoss Cartwright's leakcrime was an answer to the question "What the fuck is Stuxnet?"  

Wife Of Orlando Shooter Omar Mateen Arrested

The wife of the late gay Islamic terrorist Omar Mateen was arrested today on charges of obstructing the FBI's investigation of the massacre as well as providing material support to the massacre effort. For the purpose of charging the widow, Noor Salman, poviding material support consists of having been present when the bullets were bought and having shared a motor vehicle with her late husband at a time when it passed the eventual site of the massacre.

Mateen's estate had previously been victimized by a Bill of Attainder filed against the alias Syed Farook which prevents life insurance policies payable against Mateen from paying to the policies' contractually designated beneficiaries. The widow robbed of her estate has now been officially designated a villain as Hussein Bahamas continues mounting a rearguard action to overwhelm the incoming President elect.

Shinohai Shitcoin Roundup Xtend: VERified Mining Scam And More

Bitcoin Unlimited and Roger Ver ally GBMiners made rounds in the news this week, when a link was discovered between Amit Bhardwaj and Gainbitcoin, a "cloud mining" Ponzi scheme, which absolutely no one could have predicted. Qntra had previously reported on ViaBTC using the same scheme to prop up support for the "Unlimited" Bitcoin fork. Gainbitcoins promises a 10% return on their 1.5TH/s "mining contracts" priced at 1 BTC, which at currently network difficulty should produce and output of < 0.04 BTC per month. Evidence from a bitcointalk thread indicates Gainbitcoins is merely a regurgitation of the Hashocean scam.

A report by the Chinese CERT listed Ripple as one of the most insecure "cryptocurrencies" tested in a group. Other altcorns tested included Dogecoin, Dash, and everyone's favorite flaming-tire-in-a-shitpit, Ether. (archived)

"21co" CEO Balaji Srinivasan (WoT:nonperson) deleted all the tweets from his twitter timeline, leading some to speculate.

Litecoin added segwit support concurrent with an announcement from Coinbase CEO Brian Armstrong (WoT:nonperson) that activating segwit would be "good for Bitcoin" and hopefully draw a new segment of users back to their exchange after suffering problems due to an IRS investigation of its user base.

Under Pressure Domestic Margin Trading At Chinese fiat/Bitcoin Interfaces Folding

Following pressure from the "People's" Bank of China, the major Chinese fiat/Bitcoin interfaces have brought an end to margin trading for domestic Chinese customers. Further fiat side interference with fiat/Bitcoin interfaces is expected to continue or accelerate over 2017.

"Women's March" Alienating White Women With Platform

A planned "Women's March" to protest the inauguration of the United States President Elect has begun losing support among white women1 who had initially planned to attend. This trend has been praised by culturally Marxist fake news outlets including the Washington Post who embrace the divisive radicalism which has come to mark ideological opponents of the Great Again's summoning.

Meanwhile NBC News commentator2 Michael Eric Dyson3 is demanding that white Americans set up Individual Reparations Accounts for the purpose of directing a portion of their income to "Black" cultural institutions. Presumably these planned defined contribution reparations are to be made in addition to random reparations collections sanctioned by cultural Marxists.

In seven days Hussein Bahamas' term as United States president will expire according to the rules of the United States Constitution.

  1. A demographic that if the popular press is to believed was evenly split between presidential candidates this election cycle.  

  2. Sponsored by Georgetown University 

  3. Not to be confused with the fictional character responsible for creating Skynet in the Terminator film series.