Not Quite News Roundup Xtend 7

Welcome to the seventh edition of the Qntra Not Quite News Roundup Xtend (TM)(R). The below events are alleged to have happened, but they are decidedly innocent of newsworthiness.

  • Self identified "mental health counselors" are bullish on a Donald Trump-Clinton presidency due to an increase anxiety among self identified socialists.
  • Charlotte, North Carolina has been experiencing acute unrest after yet another police shooting initiated yet another media circus.
  • As enrollment contracts at the University of Missouri dorm style housing is replacing independent apartments for graduate students living on campus and a freeze has been placed on building permits for new private residential construction near the campus. This suggests the University is leaning heavily on reasserting in loco parentis to cope with its loss of Universitiquity.
  • Roger Ver opened a mining pool under his "" brand. This mining pool is potantially vulnerable to a distraction of service attack where other mining pools in addition to publishing valid Bitcoin blocks publish blocks invalid due to having a size between one and sixteen megabytes which Ver's pool will attempt to build off of due to their choice of aspiring altcoin network client.
  • Stormy weather continues on the Freenode IRC network.
  • The soybean harvest is beginning in earnest, your loss immanent.
  • "Scary Clown" sightings are all the rage as local police departments across North America issue press releases addressing the sightings.
  • Bayer announced that if their acquisition of Monsanto passes through regulatory approval into consumation, they have no particular desire to use the Monsanto name for anything.
  • A couple dutchmen were arrested for stealing electricity in order to grow marijuana plants and operate a mining farm which otherwise would have been sorely -EV.
  • A growing number of alleged patents supposed by fiat entities on technologies related to the blockchain continue making the possibility of fiat business impossible.
  • The first televised debates between the two aspects of Clinton seeking the United States presidency will happen Monday if Hillary Rodham-Clinton's health allows it.
  • Something, Something Brian Krebs.
  • The website known as Mark Zuckerberg (WOT:nonperson) presents Facebook issued an apology after advertisers discovered they were being served grossly inflated viewership statistics.
  • A cease fire negotiated among fiat governments concerning Syria began and ended this week.

Sorry for your loss.

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