RBG Black Rebel Sanctioned Further As Police Apparently Fear Mysterious Organization

Alleged Rebel But Gangster Black Rebels member Justin Payne faces further sanctions after police allege a tweet was sent from one of his old alleged twitter accounts. The tweets reportedly alleged that police and the FBI set Payne up, expressed remorse that alleged Dallas police shooter Micah Johnson was killed in a drone strike, and further suggested that Micah Johnson was a Rebel But Gangster Black Rebel. Payne was hit with six months of house arrest and intensified monitoring of his computer and cellular phone use. Payne waived his opportunity to challenge this restrictions in a hearing though Payne has not admitted authorship of the tweets.

This development raises serious questions about the Rebel But Gangster Black Rebels including:

  1. Why does this organization alleged to have a national presence only appear in a local newspaper.
  2. Where does this organization fall on the "law enforcement" threat radar? Somewhere around ISIS or somewhere around Trendon Shavers?
  3. Is the whole Rebel But Gangster Black Rebels just one of those entrapment things law enforcement sets up to create terrorists, except this one outgrew their sandbox?

Peace in our time.

Brian Armstrong Still Has Hard On For Harkforks

Hoping to climb to the top of the "fork all the things" subculture, Coinbase CEO Brian Armstrong (WOT:nonperson) is now intent on a push to hardfork reddit's r/bitcoin, calling on reddit CEO Steve Huffman to remove /u/theymos as moderator and turn control of the subreddit over to persons more aligned with Coinbase's business interests. Huffman attempted a neutral take stating: “We’ve seen that with the Bitcoin community, I don't disagree with you at all. Right now, our opinion is that we try to stay hands-off unless they’re breaking other, site-wide rules." Speculation still abounds that Roger Ver is helping to finance the lulz, going so far as to offer a bounty in order to have theymos removed. Ver is widely known for quoting himself and paying mercenaries to spam links to his forum across various social media sites. Armstrong publicly weeks prior that he was unsubscribing from r/Bitcoin and instead getting his news from r/btc instead, though as other reddit users point out, listening to redditards can have real-life disatrous consequences. Reddit has a history of censorship aimed at promoting other Y-Combinator associated ventures. Peace in our time.

Ether Huffing Gossip Continues, Exchanges Risk Insolvency

Ethereum vs. Ethereum Classic continues to be top on the gossip list on this week's shitcoin roundup. Beleaguered fiat-to-cryptocoin exchanges Coinbase/GDAX and btc-e have both declared the "Classic" fork a scam,1 and have declared they will not release user funds on that particular side of the fork. Classic continued to have more volume overall in the past 24 hours, moving $ 38,714,800 compared to Ethereum's $ 19,722,200. Ethereum project collaborators such as MIT and now Cornell are frantically hoping to use their new magic mutable blockchain powers to convince users that this is really how crypto works, with Cornell sponsoring a "Ethereum Blockchain Bootcamp" with Pope Vitalik Butterin himself in attendance. (archived).


  1. The actual scam is that in spite of being enlightened as to how hard forks work, the leaked numerous tokens on the chain that was initially in the minority and now they have a hole in their books that can only be filled by playing fiat with declarations the coins never existed when in fact they lost them.  

LastPass Sucks, Always Sucked

Tavis Ormandy (WOT:nonperson) uncovered a serious security vulnerability in LastPass. Before disclosing the vulnerability to LastPass developers, Ormandy tweeted:

Are people really using this lastpass thing? I took a quick look and can see a bunch of obvious critical problems. I'll send a report asap.

Due to the number of suckers entrusting LastPass for every login, Ormandy received numerous panicked responses due to a postmortem published yesterday on a serious vulnerability that lets websites take passwords held by Lastpass at will. Peace in our time.

Monsanto Led Dicamba Enthusiasm Raises Tensions Among Farmers

The debut of Monsanto's "Roundup Ready Xtend Crop System(TM)(R)" is raising tensions among soybean and cotton farmers who have and have not adopted the seed component of the system, especially in the American Mid South (archived). This year's combination of weather and desperate tillage has lead to ideal conditions for Palmer's Amaranth to flourish in soybean fields threatening to greatly reduce yields by shading soybean plants and consuming soil nitrogen1 far more aggressively than the soybeans can.

Glyphosate resistant Palmer's Amaranth after its debut in 2006 has swiftly spread across the country and this year's proliferation of the weed has forced farmers who planted "Roundup Ready Xtend Crop System(TM)(R)" cotton and soybeans to spray their fields with Dicamba. The twist is that Monsanto isn't done bringing the herbicide portion of "Roundup Ready Xtend" to market so farmers who planted seeds from this Monsanto crop system are just spraying and dumping Dicamba on their fields out of desperation. Farmers who lack these seeds are watching their soybeans curl up and suffer, because Dicamba is especially effective on legumes.

The fallout from this year's soybean season will likely include the consumption of immense amounts of various EPA and Department of Agriculture functionaries time, substantial monetary penalties and torts against the farmers who manage to harvest soybeans this year, and pain for Monsanto as restrictions on applying Dicamba increase and diminish the point of marketing Dicamba resistant soybeans. Sorry for your loss.


  1. Most plants take soil nitrogen and pump it into growing above the soil. Palmer's Amaranth isn't content with that. It takes soil nitrogen for growth and then takes still more soil nitrogen and stores it as nitrates. At one point Palmer's Amaranth was grown as a staple grain, but in the contemporary farm environment the level of nitrates accumulated turn the plant toxic.  

Royal Dutch Shell Shocked! Losses!

Declining oil prices significantly impacted the profits of Royal Dutch Shell, which reported the lowest earnings in over a decade. Reported profits sank 72 percent, for a total reported profit of $1.05 billion. Company leadership cites low oil prices, which traded around $44 per barrel last week which is up from $35.21 earlier this year, and $63.50 a year ago. The oil industry has shown no signs of recovery. Sorry for your loss.

Cow Hospitalizes Police Officer And Damages Patrol Vehicles

An eight hundred pound cow competing at the Cowlitz County Fairgrounds in Longview, Washington managed to escape its captors initiating a police chase that lead to the hospitalization of one officer and damage to several police patrol vehicles (archived). Police tazered the 2/5th ton contender for "most spirited" animal before fatally shooting it. Local media reports the cow's owner was injured declining to discuss circumstances of the farmer's injuries. Last November police in neighboring Idaho killed a bull and its owner after the bull was mauled by a Subaru that failed to yield to the bull as required by law. Peace in our time.

John Hinckley Junior Released From Psychiatric Hospital

John Hinckley Junior, (WOT:nonperson) the man who shot Ronald Reagan (WOT:deceased), is being released from the psychiatric hospital where the United States government has held him for reprogramming since he was found not criminally responsible for the March 30th, 1981 shooting. In addition to Reagan, Hinckley wounded a police officer, a secret service agent, and crippled press secretary James Brady (WOT:deceased). For political reasons Brady's 2014 death was ruled a homicide resulting from his being shot 33 years earlier.

EU Trying A Bitcoin Registry Seeing How Regulation Fails

The EU supposes that if they can't actually regulate Bitcoin, they can make a registry for it. The proposed central registry would be fed data through all cyrptocurrency wallet providers and exchanges operating within European Union member nations. Law enforcement agencies across the Europe Union would have access to the registry under the pretense anti-terrorism.1 Sorry for your laws.


  1. You know terrorism like #Brexit, Italeave, and Departugal.  

Coinbase Fumbling Through Ether Huffing Fork Experience

Early this morning on Twitter, Coinbase's "exchange" GDAX announced they will temporarily maintain sole custody of the Classic portion of their Ether huffers' forked tokens for several weeks. The exchange released an announcement:

100% of ETC associated with ETH balances at the time of the hard fork are secured in GDAX cold storage.

We plan to allow withdrawal of an amount of ETC that corresponds to ETH balances at the time of the hard fork. We'll be working on this feature over the coming weeks and will provide updates via this Twitter account.

The freeze has some users on social media wondering if early post fork shenanigans at Coinbase might have threatened the firm's solvency. Sorry fork, your loss.