Renzi Resigns As Voters Reject His Agenda And Tell Brussels "Vaffanculo" Suggesting Future #Italeave

Italian Prime Minister Matteo Renzi announced he would be stepping down after voters rejected his agenda of "reforms" during a referendum. As in Brexit and The Great Again's summoning, voters went populist and nationalist in rejecting the entrenched fiat establishment's plans. Once again voters "surprised" many purveyors of "Fake News" like the New York Times. This referendum's failure does not commit Italy to #Italeave the European Union, but it does kick the ball in that direction with a strong "Vaffanculo " directed at Brussels.

Trumpreich Swamp Draining Plans Still Elusive, No Dykes, Weirs, Or Windmills Proposed

The United States President Elect has still failed to present any plans for a system of dykes, weirs, and windmills to drain water from the swamp. He was however begun filling out his cabinet. Notable selections include:

  • Tom Price,¬† former orthopedic surgeon and future secretary of Health and Human services. This move has generated heated debated with lines roughly drawn between health customer service providers that draw comfortable salaries and those who attempt operating a business by billing for services.
  • James 'Mad Dog' Mattis, retired US Marine Corps General for secretary of defense. This selection has been unusually unchallenged in the press. Mattis is notable for bombing wedding parties1 and an unusual willingness to relieve his command of officers who would not get with his program. Mattis enjoys a retirement gig as a Director on the board of General Dynamics and Theranos.
  • Betsy Davos, an heir by marriage to the Amway multi level marketing fortune, to secretary of education.
  • Preet Bharara to continue as United States Attorney for the District of Manhattan.
  • No pick has been announced for Secretary of State. Instead the fate of the position filled by failed presidential candidates Hillary Rodham-Clinton and John Kerry is surrounded by rumors, innuendo, and speculation in line with the sacred traditions of "reality" television.

  1. Notable benefit: less surviving relatives to avenge the deceased  

No Such lAbs Unveils FUCKGOATS

No Such lAbs (MPEx:S.NSA) announced its first hardware product today, the eunymous FUCKGOATS.

FUCKGOATS is an auditable true random number generator with highly concentrated1, significant entropy debit2 and a particularly resilient design. The price point is a shade under 3 Bitcents (shipping included). The unit can be plugged directly into any USB connector. Various tools & utilities are bundled with each purchase.

Peace in our uTime!


  1. 7.9999 and over bits per byte. 

  2. Upwards of 1Kbps. 

Emergency Mozilla Bulletin: Stop Using Firefox

In a concession by Mozilla to yesterday's news, per an emergency bulletin published by Mozilla, users are advised to stop using Mozilla's Firefox web browser. Versions 41 through 50 are being affected by a zero day exploit discovered in active use against Firefox on Windows with Tor being used to select victims for exploitation. May you find Peace in this prefect storm of shitware.

Qntra (S.QNTR) November 2016 Report

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For the month of November 2016, Qntra published 48 articles for a total of 6520 words.*

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shinohai 1308 - 260FA57BCE677A5C04BF60BA4A75883CC1B1D34C

Mircea Popescu 614 - 6160E1CAC8A3C52966FD76998A736F0E2FB7B452

asciilifeform 332 - 17215D118B7239507FAFED98B98228A001ABFFC7

Total : 6520

Total words qualifying for shares - 6520

*This excludes one article - Last month's report
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On Deedbot

Reddit CEO Huffman Takes It Pao, Right In The Kisser

Reddit CEO Steve Huffman has announced the "Free Speech" platform will now be cracking down on "trolls" and abusive users, following last weeks brouhaha in which he admitted to altering user comments that accused him of pedophilia. The effort will involve closely following user abuse reports, adding more filtering capacity, and suspending or banning users that target others. Plans also include to add more employees to the Trust and Safety team , instead of relying on community based moderation as it has in the past.

Huffman said in a draft of an upcoming blog post that he had been asked by users "to ban r/The_Donald outright", but he had rejected that idea, because "if there is anything about this election that we have learned, it is that there are communities that feel alienated and just want to be heard, and Reddit has always been a place where those voices can be heard." It is unknown whether the "voices being heard" would be further censored by Huffman and reddit staff during the course of publication.

18 Year Old Somali Child Killed By Police At The Ohio State University

An 18 year old Somali child was killed by police on the campus of The Ohio State University following a bias incident. The child drove a vehicle into a crowd of pedestrians before using a butcher's knife in an attempt to negate the innate priviledge they held compared to the 18 year old Somali child. Responding police officers failed to recognize the child was lashing upwards against priviledge and instead of compassionately empowering him, they transitioned him into being just another victim of police violence.

Pence in our time.

DT Customers Lose Service Due To "Cyber Attack"

Deutsche Telekom has reportedly been hit with a cyberattack that has caused hundreds of thousand of its customers to be without service since Sunday afternoon. German government and company officials say that approximately 900,000 customers, around 4.5% of it's fixed-line customer base, have been affected by the attack. The company was giving few details as to the nature of the attack, but stated on their website:

"Based on the pattern of errors, it can not be ruled out that the router has been targeted externally, with the result that it can no longer log on to the network"

Some customers believe that the tight-lipped response is due to Deutsche Telekom not knowing the full extent of the issues at hand, and many took to social media to vent as the company's hotline and online customer center were rendered unreachable due to the outages. The only fix suggested by the company on their website at this time was to "try turning the router off, wait 30 seconds, then turn it back on again".